Here’s a little confession. Despite the fact that I write a blog, a weekly message, magazine articles and am currently finishing up my second book I really don’t enjoy writing all that much.
Writing doesn’t really come natural to me. It’s a lot of work and forces me to spend more time alone then I really like.
What I do love is life change.
What I do love is personal growth.
What I do love is watching how God can take words on a page and heal wounds, overcome fears, and breathe life into dreams.
I received this email this week from a young lady who read Plan B . I’ve read it every day this week just so I would be motivated to keep writing and humbly begging God to use these words to impact His children.
I’m a 20 year old Junior at the University of North Carolina at Greensboro hoping to get my bachelors in English with a focus in creative writing. I grew up in church world, but I wasn’t saved until April of 2009.
My road to Christ has been a deeply painful struggle. At thirteen I began a painful struggle with self-harm and cutting. When I was sixteen I became involved in an abusive relationship. This boy completely tore me down. Emotionally he shattered my self worth. He would call me names, belittle me, and make me feel completely worthless. Physically, after dating for a few months, I was beat on a regular basis. In march of 2006 I was raped by this person who I thought I loved. This was not a one time event and occurred several times until I was able to get out of the relationship. However, the incident in march had the most lasting consequences. I became pregnant after that first time with a little boy (who I named Micah Rhys.) Though it is painful for me to even type this, at 14 weeks pregnant I was beaten so severely that I miscarried. I was confused and hurt. Why would God allow me to be raped, get pregnant, and once I had decided to keep the child (and love him) rip him from me?
Flash forward 4 years. In July of this year I was raped by an exboyfriend. I found myself 20 and possibly pregnant, again, from a rape. It was at the same time that God prompted me to read your book. My relationship with God had become stale and I was still dealing with the pain from my past, not to mention the recent tragedy. Of course, there were numerous other things going on in my life at the time that were causing me great distress. Although I was a Christian, I was struggling in a major way. At this point I was completely convinced that God was punishing me for a reason I was struggling to understand.
I had seen tweets about your book but I didn’t pay too much attention at the time. I always thought, “Sounds good, but maybe later.” Until one night when I was laying in bed unable to sleep. I couldn’t get the title of your book of my mind and that night I got out of my, got on amazon, and bought a copy.
I wish I could write you and tell you, such and such part of the book changed my life, but I can’t.
I can, however, say the book as a whole saved my life.
It quite literally saved me. I was headed on a trip for a week right after I received the book and at the time did not plan on returning from this trip. I had every intention of finding some way to end my life. I was scared, confused, hurt, and convinced I was being punished. God couldn’t possibly love me.
Even when I began reading, I had no intention of sticking around to even finish the book. If I could finish before the trip was over, great. If not? I was still going to go through with ending my life. But, something inside of me nagged at me to hold on until I finished.
Somewhere between page one and the end of the book, I heard God’s gentle voice calling me back. Through the stories I was reminded that I was not alone in my pain. I was reminded that God did love me.
Pete, God used your book to restore my hope. Though I feel as though I am, and have been for many years, stuck in a Saturday… I know Sunday is coming. I don’t know when, and I certainly don’t “feel” like it is going to happen. But, as I’ve spent the weeks after reading the book immersing myself in learning God’s character, I know God will follow through with his promises to me.
There was so much more I wanted to say, but my only thoughts at the moment are to thank you for writing the book and allowing God to use you. I know my life has been changed. And, I feel like this may be a book I’ll pull out and reread through out my life.
So for all you writers, bloggers, speakers, and pastors. Keep doing what you’re doing. Keep writing the words God puts on your heart. You never know how God may use them to impact a life.